i haven't done as much homework as i should have but i'm going to finish that on the 12-hour car ride tomorrow.
i went shopping and am returning home with a completely new wardrobe (basically), my prom dress, necklace, earrings, shoes, AND purse, and a much more positive self-image than i left evansville with.
tonight is my last family dinner. we leave tomorrow at 8. i'm not ready to leave. me and my mom have been rubbing each other the wrong way, and i don't want to leave with her being fussy with me, especially after having been treated incredibly kindly by my aunt/stand-in mom all week.
i am, however, excited to see dylan. i just wish that karinne and everyone would hang out with us. i don't want to get out of the car just to sit on a couch or at the movies. i want to DO something and see people. i don't know.
i hate the situation i'm in with friends at the moment. obviously, blake and dylan, you two are godsends. but i miss being that girl surrounded by a group of best friends. i miss that community of friends. i don't like getting on facebook to see my friends posing at the zoo on the same stump that we ALL messed around on last year. it upsets me that they've discluded me from that and i don't know what to do. caleb and melissa and kaleen and everyone are great, but they're not my best friends. they're better friends with eachother and with blake that a lot of the times, i feel like i should just not eat with them. that's silly, of course...i appreciate their friendship. i just want my boyfriend at my school to eat with and a network of friends to come home to.
what the hell, this was a cheery post.
moving on, i got into pratt's summer program into my first choice elective, which is art and design discovery. now to wait and see if i got the merit scholarship. please, god, let me have gotten it. i can't afford a $4500 summer program. regardless, my family is saving every penny--packing lunch, not eating out, shopping at cheaper stores, etc--in order for me to go, which makes me happy.
i'll write more later on this...i'm terribly excited to write it all down, but it's dinner time.
peace, love.
Cassie, we're glad to have you eat lunch with us. The more, the merrier. Obviously, we can't take the place of your old friends, but we enjoy you hanging out with us.
ReplyDeletewow, I was unaware that you read my blog, haha.
ReplyDeleteit's not like that...I know that you guys don't mind my eating with you. I don't get a bad vibe from you...it's just that I'm used to something different, and it's hard for me to accept being the outsider of sorts.