tomorrow i'm moving and it's exhausting and sad and horrible. and it doesn't help that i don't feel built up by anyone i have a relationship with except blake. ross was too depressed to date me and has been fucking weird since (i just want my book back.) and i'm talking to another guy i met a pixfest who i really want to like but i'm just not feeling amazing about it anymore. my mom is dealing with her own issues and jaime's issues so i can't burden her & yet somehow feel like i am without really even saying much. daniella is being really awful to me and i just cant deal right now.
i just feel like everyone is draining me, and it makes me really sad because i thought things would be different by now. i thought i'd have a job and a little apartment and a boyfriend. and instead i got none of that. and i know i need to keep positive but it's just really hard right now. feeling like ross liked me felt amazing, and i know that i don't need other people to validate me but i liked that connection. and i'm glad that he said something to me and is not with me because i know he's depressed, and he would just be draining me too.
i don't know. everything is scattered right now. sorry for a scattered post
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